Oh man, within two weeks I've fought with a co worker, another one made me cry (hormones had a big role in this), made my team lead and her bf fight, and now our lovely manager is leaving our account (in a fort night, though) which made me cry earlier (again, I blame hormones) when she announced it. I thought I can't cry anymore, or at least I don't. Turns out I can and I do. Maybe all the suppressed emotions are starting to explode in one single motion.
Last week, I went to the hospital to set an appointment with a shrink, which would be on the 16th. I don't know how long I'll last at this rate without going to one. "Ber" months seem to be my relapse months. I need to officially know what my behavior is. I need to know how mentally ill I am.
I don't really feel so good, tbh. I feel like I could jump off from the bridge that I pass by to work at any moment. I keep saying out loud suicidal jokes. My coworkers haven't noticed yet. Or maybe they have. I feel like crying again.
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