I feel a lot more shitty every time I try to sleep and/or every time before I sleep, as if my brain wants me to keep doing something. There isn't even anything to do. Sleep is the only thing that is surely going to give you comfort. Why the heck would you not let me give that to you?
I tried to sleep at 1:40 am. After around 30 minutes, I'm still awake, so I got up and went down, because I read that if you couldn't sleep after 30 minutes, then it's most likely you wouldn't be able to sleep most of the night so you have to get out of bed and read or something. Now it's 4:26 am. I still can't sleep. Goddammit.
I was whispering my thoughts out loud earlier. Not really a good sign. I blame myself for eating a lot of chocolate related food for the past two to three weeks even when I'm not allowed to eat chocolate. I deserve this.
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