Just Thought I'd Be Happy By Now

This melancholy visits me too often. I don't think anyone deserves this. No one can handle this. I should have already been dead. Fucking. If I have a purpose, then why does it have to be this way? Why do I have to always feel like this? Don't fucking tell me it gets better. That doesn't apply to everyone. Don't tell me "laban lang". I'm sick of that. Man, these low lows are really killing me. It will never stop. It does go away, temporarily. But it always comes back. You normal people are fucking lucky.